Tag: Self Care

How I can Save You Up To $1495 on an Office Chair!

Posted on by Mary Derbyshire

This post may contain affiliate links.

This is no joke.

I just GOOGLED “ergonomic office chairs” and found chairs that cost upwards of $1500!

Photo: Unsplash: Florian Klauer

Here is the secret: you don’t need one.

You can find a perfectly good chair at a local store or better yet recycle one from a friend’s garage sale and paint it if you must.

This is what to look for and it may surprise you.

  1. Find a chair like a kitchen or dining room chair.
  2. Make sure that the seat is firm. You do not want a rush seat. If you find that the chair is too firm and uncomfortable you can put a cushion on the chair. You know the ones I am talking about. They have little strings on them so that you can tie them to the chair back. You can find these cushions at hardware stores or home good stores
  3. The seat should be flat. It should not be hollowed out nor should it slope backward. This is very important. Backward sloping chairs make you slouch.
  4. Chair heights vary. The height of the chair should allow your feet to touch the floor. Your whole foot does not need to touch the floor, just some part is enough. If you are very tall find the highest chair possible.
  5. Buy your self a sitting wedge- you will be forever grateful. Your hips like to be higher than your knees. A sitting wedge is higher on one side than the other. You sit on the high side and this raises your hips. You want the wedge to be firm and not too squishy. The height of wedge should be about 3-4”. Here are 2 wedges I like: the first is the Desk Jockey Car Seat but I also like it at my desk. Desk Jockey also makes a really nice lumbar support that I highly recommend   My other absolute favorite wedge is the Gymnic Movin. It is inflatable so you can adjust its firmness. It also moves so it makes your sitting more dynamic. Your body likes to MOVE and the Gymnic Movin’ allows for Dynamic Sitting! However, this wedge is not for everyone. If you have balance issues opt for the Desk Jockey instead. Just click on the pictures and you will be taken to the product. If you want to splurge here is a great adjustable chair. It actually is a chair for cellists but I use it in my studio they also make one for taller people. Just click on the image and it will take you to the site. 
  6. If you must sit on soft furniture place a cushion behind your back to support better sitting. The pillow will prevent you from slouching and will provide a bit of support.

So I have just given you some easy and inexpensive solutions to sitting problems.

Remember small changes can have big impacts. Sign up for my FREE video course Sitting for Success here.

Or you can purchase a longer course 5 Ways to Heal Back Pain here.

Let me know how this works for you- I would love to hear from you!

 

My name is Mary Derbyshire. I am a fitness and movement coach. My methodology is the Alexander Technique, a mindfulness-based practice that teaches you how to move better. When you move better you feel better and when you feel better your whole life improves. You can get my Amazon best-selling book Agility at Any Age: Discover the Secret to Balance, Mobility, and Confidence here.

 

1.Copyright: <a href=’https://www.123rf.com/profile_cherezoff’>cherezoff / 123RF Stock Photo</a>

Out In The Day

Posted on by Mary Derbyshire

This post may contain affiliate links.

Why am I posting this video and what does a cold, bleak, stormy day at the beach have to do with feeling better and less stressed?

I think that it is fair to say that we all feel better when we get outdoors. A walk on the beach, or in the park, or even down the sidewalk changes your mood and boosts your spirit.

But for us in the Northeast of the United States when December sets in and the days become long and dark and the wind can howl or the rain and snow can fall getting yourself outside can take heroic strength.

Right? Just watch the video again. I really had to talk myself into going outside that day. But I am so happy I did! It was exhilarating. I felt whole and free.

The wind howled and the waves crashed. It was beautiful.

Getting outside and going for a walk even a short one to the mailbox will change your mood. Getting outside and walking calms you down and lifts you up especially on a cold dark winter’s day.

Year’s ago when I lived in Dublin, Ireland I had a friend and colleague Frank Kennedy who also taught the Alexander Technique. He was an avid hill walker and would walk the hills around Dublin in the dreariest of days. As you probably know Ireland can be pretty rainy and cold. Frank used to say that you had to get “out in the day.”

I love that expression “”out in the day.”

No matter what the weather may be. Rain or snow, wind or cold you have to tell yourself to get out in the day. This is a sure way to build more calm and quiet into your life.

Thank you for reading my post. I have created a FREE short video course called Sitting for Success you can get it here and feel free to share it with friends. My holiday gift to you : https://app.ruzuku.com/courses/25548/about

5 Ways To De-Stress Your Holidays

Posted on by Mary Derbyshire

Do you find the month of December challenging?     

The expectations, the family obligations, the social gatherings can really add up to some serious stress!

That is why this year I have created a mini course to help you counter the stress of the holiday season.

5 short videos that teach you simple but powerful and effective ways to be happier, feel lighter and less stressed out!

I have been teaching the Alexander Technique for nearly 25 years and one of the amazing effects of a an AT lesson is that you feel incredibly calm afterwards.

I just had a new student start with me last week and she remarked that she can not remember a time has ever felt so relaxed.

In this short video course I teach you several of these stress- busting practices. You can get the course here! https://app.ruzuku.com/courses/25154/about

How to Change Your Trajectory

Posted on by Mary Derbyshire

This post may contain affiliate links.

Do you want to hear a surprising truth?   

You don’t have to take a 180-degree turn to make a change in your life. To change all you need to do is move one degree away from where you are right now and you will be on a new trajectory.

This is important. Many people think that change has to be radical like a total make-over, a do-over, a transformation from a cocoon to a butterfly.

It is hard to change radically. Humans like consistency and change needs to be subtle or else it is too overwhelming.

We live in a culture that places enormous value on extremes and because of this often times the complex is heralded and the subtle is overlooked or even dismissed.

For instance, you may think that the only way to get rid of back or neck pain is with strong medicine, a shot of cortisone or surgery. All of these options are extreme.

There are alternative ways that are more subtle and very effective.

Perhaps just changing the way that you sit, stand and walk could lessen or eliminate your pain and change your life for the better.

As an Alexander Technique teacher, this is what I do. In very subtle ways I teach you how to change the way that you move and even the way that you think.

Here is a testimonial from Rosemary who had watched a short video I had made about the importance of releasing unnecessary muscular tension in her body.

I often tell people to think about not clenching their tongue and jaw.

Clenching your tongue and jaw is harmful to the head/neck/spine relationship and this compromises the way that you move and live.

Mary, I just wanted to let you know how much better I am sleeping since watching your video a month ago.

You said to unclench your teeth. I didn’t even know I was doing that until you pointed it out.

Now, as I am dozing off, I tell myself “relax your jaw” and poof off to sleep! Thank you, thank you, thank you!!!!

So, for Rosemary, here was a simple and subtle solution to address a common problem. Releasing the jaw to calm down so as to be able to easily fall asleep.

This is how the Alexander Technique works. An Alexander Technique teacher gives you cues either with verbal instruction or with their hands to

teach you how to release unnecessary muscular tension and to redirect yourself through space.

This excessive muscular tension interferes with the way that you use yourself or in other words the way that you move and even think.

As a result with less clenched muscles, you move more freely, with greater ease and very often with less or no pain.

Why don’t you give it a try!

There are many ways to study and learn with me. I teach privately in Little Compton, RI. Or you can purchase my Amazon bestselling book Agility at Any Age: Discover the Secret to Balance, Mobility, and Confidence here, Or you can sign up for my FREE video course Sitting for Success here https://app.ruzuku.com/courses/25548/about

Get in touch! I would love to hear from you! You can send me an email at maryderby1@gmail.com

Photo: Unsplash, Sean Stratton

What is this sign, What is the Alexander Technique and Why Does it Matter?

Posted on by Mary Derbyshire

Earlier this summer my name was included on Primary Care Partnership’s sign.

See! That’s me on the bottom shingle Mary Derbyshire, M.AmSAT.

It is such an honor to be included on the same sign as these other practitioners! Dr’s Cathleen Hood and Karen Ottenstein have selected a few allied partners to provide alternative methodologies alongside their traditional allopathic practice. It is not unheard of traditional doctors reaching out to acupuncture or massage therapy but it is highly unlikely that there are doctors who would reach out to an Alexander Technique teacher. Most doctors haven’t even heard of the technique and that is a real shame.

For those of you who do not know about the Alexander Technique, it is a mindfulness based practice that teaches you how to move better. Most of us habitually bring way too much muscular tension to our activities. This muscular tension interferes with the way that your body moves.

Often times pain and stiffness and poor coordination result from this excessive tension.

An Alexander Technique teacher teaches you how to prevent this unnecessary tension and as a result, you move more freely. Pain and stiffness are decreased or eliminated. Your balance and coordination improve.

You feel better in your skin!

And because your mind and your body are a unified whole what you do with your body affects the mind. Your thinking improves. Your clarity improves. You feel whole and connected.

I first met Dr.Cathleen Hood a couple of years ago. I will let her tell the story of how we met.

“I first heard about Mary from a patient. The patient’s story is remarkable. At an advanced age, she suffered a fall and fractured her neck, resulting in what the neurosurgeon deemed an unstable situation. He offered a surgical fixation so that slippage would not cause quadriplegia, but the patient declined.

She did not want to be impaired by the side effects of narcotics, so she called her friend Mary, who through the Alexander Technique gave her the tools to control her pain.

She was also regaining range of motion, and it was healing slowly by itself. With no drug side effects, she was mindful not to trip or fall again. I thought I need to meet this person!”

This story is so important for many reasons.

First, the Alexander Technique is not only effective at getting rid of pain but it can also be very effective in controlling pain. In these times of opioid addiction, there is an alternative to drugs and their extremely harmful side effects. For some, The Alexander Technique (AT) can be that alternative and should be taken seriously by the medical community.

Years ago I had an older student who was scoliotic and had severe pain her entire adult life. AT got her out of that pain. Her husband a rheumatologist at Mass General Hospital was so impressed he said that “every Dr. should have access to an AT teacher in his or her practice.” I am thrilled to be the Alexander Technique teacher for Primary Care Partnership!

Secondly, the Alexander Technique teaches you about self -care. A series of lessons will teach you the tools to be mindful of how you move. I love it when students return for their second lesson and remark that they are so much more aware of how they are moving.

Self- care is health care and self -awareness plays a part. How can you change and improve if you do not recognize what you are doing in the first place?

Thirdly embracing the Alexander Technique represents a paradigm shift. It says “Use” matters. What do I mean by “Use?” (Use is pronounced as loose) Use is the way that you use your body and your mind. How you sit, how you stand, how you walk, how you run, how you think it all matters to your health and well being! A LOT! And here is the thing- only you can change your use. I can help you or another Alexander Technique teacher can help you, but your use will only change and improve if you attend to it.

What do you think? Are you ready to change for the better? Click here to schedule an appointment https://app.acuityscheduling.com/schedule.php?owner=12624320 

Click here http://amzn.to/2fsZsnQ to purchase my Amazon best-selling book Agility at Any Age: Discover the Secret to Balance, Mobility, and Confidence 

Feel free to email me with any questions! maryderby1@gmail.com

Joy, Why You Need It!

Posted on by Mary Derbyshire

Check out this photo of Gary surfing. Look at the size of that wave! Do you see joy? I do!

Image of a man surfing a big wave expressing joy.

This is January in New England folks! Cape Cod to be exact.

There is no stopping him!

Surfers are a rare breed.

Living in a town that is considered a surfer’s paradise, I have worked with many over the years.

No matter what the weather, when the waves are big they surf.

They surf when the air is frigid. They surf when the winds are howling.

They surf when the rain is lashing.

You can sign up for my course by clicking on the photo above!

On days when you or I wouldn’t dream of venturing outside, they surf.

And here’s the thing: they relish the wild weather that creates their waves!

From a surfer’s perspective the bigger the waves the better, and the storms that deliver those waves are celebrated.

I know Gary- he loves to surf. He might even say there is nothing on earth he loves more. He finds joy in surfing.

You can see the joy in this photo. Look at how light and open he is on his surfboard. Look how balanced he is on that wave! He is one with himself, his surfboard, the wave and the universe! He has found joy!

Joy is a motivator. Finding joy makes the impossible possible. Joy can be a new point of view!

In Born to Run author Christopher McDougall introduces us to the Taramahura tribe. These people can run barefoot 100 miles a day in the searing heat of Mexico’s Copper Canyon.

McDougall determines that this feat (no pun intended) is due to joy!

Yes! To them running 100 miles is an act of joy.

“Glee and determination are usually antagonistic emotions, yet the Tarahumara were brimming with both at once as if running to the death made them feel more alive”1

Gary surfing off the New England coast in January, people running barefoot for 100 miles in the sweltering heat, these feats could never be accomplished if they were considered a drudge.

The one element is joy!

But you need to find joy. You need to be open to it. You need to welcome it! You need to cultivate it!

One way to cultivate it is to sign up for my video course Joy! Body/ Mind De-stress. In this short and fun course, you will learn very practical ways to de-stress so that you can cultivate joy! You can sign up for the course here.

 

 

How You Move Matters! You can learn how to move better with my Amazon bestselling book Agility at Any Age: Discover the Secret to Balance, Mobility, and Confidence.  My book is illustrated with 40 videos that you access with your iPad or smartphone! You can purchase it here.

Photo of the author Mary DerbyshireMy name is Mary Derbyshire. I am a fitness and movement coach. My methodology is the Alexander Technique, a mindfulness-based practice that teaches you how to move better. When you move better you feel better and when you feel better your whole life improves! Let me know what you think or ask a question! I love to hear from my readers! Feel free to post in the comments section below.

 

 

 

  1. Christopher McDougall, Born to Run: A Hidden Tribe, Superathletes, and the Greatest Race the World Has Never Seen, (New York: Alfred A. Knopf, 2009) p.91

 

 

Self-Care Is Health Care

Posted on by Mary Derbyshire
The lion is roaring self- care is health care!
Photo: Unsplash, Lemuel Butler

Have you ever taken the time to consider that self-care is health care?

I think that this is a very important message so please read on.

I like to think that most times I am a pretty easygoing person.

Certainly, I am easy going with the exercise classes I teach.

I call them ExTension Classes! Get it?

I let people come and go as they please and only pay for the classes they attend. I never raise an eyebrow when someone hasn’t shown up in ages. I smile and nod and warmly great them.

Well, a few months ago that all changed! I was like the lion in the photo!

I went on a rant and I roared and I became very pointed and direct and said to the group “It is the New Year and it is time for you to resolve to yourself that you will attend class on a regular basis! This is your resolution. Exercise does not work unless you do it consistently! You need to make a commitment to yourself to attend class regularly. That means put it in your calendar so that when the Dr.’s office, or a friend, or anybody says “Can you make it at 9 Monday?” you say “No, I cannot make it at 9 I have my exercise class!”

Done! Easy! You put yourself first!

I think that my rant was well received and gave my class a bit more direction. My rant prompted a wonderful conversation that ensued the following week.

The topic was self-care.

We know to eat well. We know to catch 8 hours of shuteye. We know that we need to exercise.
But do you know this?

No one can take care of you as well as you can take care of yourself. Not one person.

You have to be your own caretaker.

Self -care is health care.

Taking care of yourself means moving more. Not just exercise. You need to move much of the day every day!

The human body was designed to move and our culture is way too sedentary. We are sitting ourselves to death.

We rely too much on doctors and medicine to do the things that consistent self-care can address. Moving well and moving more is one of the best things you can do to improve your quality of life.

So make a resolution to move more. Make a resolution to commit to self-care and see how your health improves. As I said before no one can take care of you as well as you can take care of yourself.

I will make a resolution to go on more rants and teach you more ways to improve your self- care. Deal?
Let me know how you are bringing more movement into your life!

You can purchase my Amazon bestselling book Agility at Any Age: Discover the Secret to Balance, Mobility, and Confidence here.

Or sign up for my course 5 Ways to Heal Back Pain here.

Let me introduce myself. My name is Mary Derbyshire and I am a movement and fitness coach. My methodology is the Alexander Technique and I am passionate about getting people moving and teaching people how to move better. When you move better you feel better and when you feel better your life improves. You CAN learn how to move better and I can teach you!

 

What Is Stopping You?

Posted on by Mary Derbyshire

“Certainty is a cruel mindset”

      Ellen Langer, Counterclockwise      

           

 

Want to know what really gets in the way of aging gracefully?

Preconceived ideas. 

Let me give you an example.

The other day a woman came to me for a session. She is in her 80’s and has been working with me for a while. She has some balance issues due to arthritis but all things considered she does incredibly well.

However this week she came in with a very painful hip and was having trouble sitting, standing and walking.

When she got to the chair and sat down she was feeling so defeated that she felt like she could not get up from the chair. In fact, she tried to stand but could not.

She believed that it was her age that was preventing her from getting out of the chair and that perhaps she would never be able to get up unassisted again.

I knew that it was her self-limiting belief that was preventing her from standing and not her ability nor her age.

I could feel the defeat and frustration build in her to the point of tears. She was so focused on her hip and her failure to stand up that indeed she could not get out of the chair.

So I changed her focus. I asked her to sing a song with me. We started singing “Hello Dolly.” And you know what? She got out of the chair like a 10-year-old. She popped in and out of the chair 3 or 4 more times.

Because she was moving better she no longer had the pain in her hip. We walked around the room. At this point, we had sung snippets of a half dozen songs and she was laughing.

We had interrupted her self-limiting preconceived idea that her hip was failing her and that she would never be able to sit and stand easily again.

Self-limiting preconceived ideas and beliefs– we all have them.

They influence our expectations of ourselves and of others but most often, these preconceptions are self-limiting beliefs.

More often than not, our expectations of ourselves are limiting, not encouraging.

They are based on old tapes that are going around and around in your head. Preconceived ideas are not based on what is actually taking place here and now.

They are based on the past and are not relevant for today.

These self-limiting beliefs become a mindset and this mindset eventually becomes a reality.

I call this place of limiting self-belief the Rat Hole.

The Rat Hole becomes a vicious circle.

Round and round you go focusing and obsessing about your limitations and what you can’t do.

You become disengaged from your active life and retreat to a place of discouragement and self -doubt.

And then you start to believe in the stereotypes about aging and what it means to get older. You invest yourself in these stereotypes and cannot imagine yourself any other way.

But it doesn’t have to be this way.

You do not have to do a 180-degree turn to change. All you have to do is shift your position or attitude a few degrees to set off on a different course.

What are your preconceived ideas about aging that could be limiting you?

Here are some that I have heard:

  1. Pain and stiffness are an integral part of getting older.

This is false. Pain and stiffness are often the results of how you do what you do. Pain and stiffness are not an inevitable part of getting older. If sitting is painful for you then chances are it is the way that you are sitting that is causing the pain. You can learn how to sit differently. In my next video “Slouch No More” you will learn simple ways to improve your sitting.

  1. I am too old to change the way I do things.

This is false. Change occurs by bringing attention or mindfulness to your activities. We can learn at any age. You are never too old to change.

  1. My balance will inevitably become compromised.

Ok, so it is true that your balance decreases as you age but by challenging your sense of balance that decline can be reversed and drastically improved. There are some very simple ways that you can challenge and improve your balance. 

  1. I’m a failure. I try hard to do X but I can’t do it no matter how hard I try.

Guess what: it’s not you. It is the trying that is getting in your way. Don’t try. Stop trying. Think of allowing yourself to do the activity. To allow is a much more constructive way to approach a task.

  1. I’m in pain now and thus I will never be able to go back to doing the things I love the most. My pain has put me in a place of inevitable decline.

The truth is that many of the aches and pains that we experience are caused by how we do things. You can learn how to move with less pain and stiffness. Pain and stiffness do not have to be an inevitable downward spiral. You can regain those activities that you thought you would never be able to do again.

You can purchase my Amazon Bestselling book Agility at Any Age: Discover the Secret to Balance, Mobility, and Confidence here. 

Plus I would LOVE to hear from you!

Be sure to sign up for my newsletter for more tips on how to get out of the rat hole of self- limiting preconceived ideas…

Book your session with me today and learn how to move with better balance, agility, and ease!

My name is Mary Derbyshire and I am a movement and fitness coach. My methodology is the Alexander Technique a mindfulness practice that teaches you HOW to move better. When you move better you feel better and when you feel better your whole life improves. I am passionate about teaching how to move and to keep them moving!